Karen if you don’t put that cookie dough back I swear-
(via coluring)
Dad Of 4 Girls Tweets Conversations With His Daughters, Proves Parenting Is Fun
Lmfaoooooo children will roast you. Truly
The 5-year-old is SAVAGE. LOL
“I read her the instructions” 😂😂😂
(via heart)
Hey, this post may contain sexually explicit content, so we’ve hidden it from public view.
Help; my wife invited wine tasters to our house and dyed the white wines red to prank them
(via ouchiehaver)
concept: me, sharing a milkshake with the one i love on a park bench. our two dogs are at our feet. we both have jobs we enjoy and find purpose in. my dress is very pretty and soon we will go to a rooftop party where there will be fairy lights and friendship. i murdered donald trump in the summer of 2016 and was never caught. everything is good.
god: okay tiny animals youre ready to be in the world!!!
ants: yipee!! yay!!!
god: okay lets make the anteater now
ants: the what
(via egberts)